Other Crap

News anchor has to apologize for saying she sometimes feels "like a retard."

Turns out only a real retard would say that. Wait. I mean a real retard would never say that because it's politically incorrect. Well, anyway, the other retards didn't like it.

It's time, once again for Uncle Scoopy's Tips for Youngsters. Here are some things you can call retards, because "retard" is offensive:

• People of differing abilities
• People with extraordinary needs
• People with alternative perceptions
• Exceptional people
• Administration spokesmen