Other Crap

Obese men less prone to suicide

Well, obviously. They can't stab themselves to death because the knife can't reach any vital organs. They can't do it with pills because they would need like eleven million horse tranquilizers. They can't jump off a cliff because they can't get up there. They can't drive their car into a wall because they can't fit behind the wheel. They can't drown because they're so buoyant. And they can't get depressed about being old and infirm because they don't live that long. They're doomed, like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day

All my mean kidding aside, experts in the field point out that "severely depressed people tend to lose weight while mildly depressed people gain weight."