Community service for wombat rape claim - New Zealand, world, sport, business & entertainment news on Stuff.co.nz

"I've been raped by a wombat."

"Cradock told police he was being raped by a wombat at his Motueka address, and sought their immediate help. He called police again soon after, and gave his full name, saying he wanted to withdraw the complaint. 'I'll retract the rape complaint from the wombat, because he's pulled out,'' Cradock told the operator at the communications centre, who had no idea what he was talking about, Mr Stringer said. 'Apart from speaking Australian now, I'm pretty all right you know, I didn't hurt my bum at all,'' Cradock then told the operator."

I'm glad it was a gentle wombat. Sometimes those wombat rapes can be hard on the ol' butt.