Late Night Political Jokes - Late Night Jokes Updated Daily

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"After a quick meet-and-greet with King Abdullah, Obama was off to Israel, where he made a quick stop at the manger in Bethlehem where he was born." --Jon Stewart

"Hey, did you see [Barack Obama] playing basketball with our troops in Iraq? Did you see that one shot he made from 40 feet? 40 feet. Let me tell you something. If shooting baskets now is a requirement to be president, a white guy may never have that job again." --Jay Leno

"Barack Obama is very popular in the Middle East. I guess a lot of people over there saw the cover of the New Yorker." --Jay Leno

"John McCain called a press conference today. Unfortunately, all the press were out of the country covering Obama. You know ... I feel kind of sorry for McCain. I mean, all day on TV, they show nothing but footage of Barack Obama touring the Middle East, being with the troops in Afghanistan, meeting with troops in Iraq. The only time I saw McCain on TV was when Willard Scott wished him a happy birthday on the 'Today' show." --Jay Leno

"Bin Laden's driver said bin Laden was not a bad client. Yeah, said he was a lot nicer than his previous client, Naomi Campbell." --Jay Leno

"There was a huge reception for Barack Obama in the Middle East this past weekend. People were screaming, chasing him, hanging on his every word. And that was just the U.S. press corps." --Jay Leno

"Let me ask you a more serious question. When you woke up this morning, did you feel a little colder, the country was a little sadder, a little lonelier, a little less hopeful? There's a reason for that [on screen: CNN telling viewers that Obama has left the country]. Don't take our hope away. We miss you. Barack Obama, the living embodiment of goodness and light, the future of human evolution." --Jon Stewart

"Hey, do you like celebrity birthdays? Here's one, Senator Larry Craig from Idaho. If you are going to Larry Craig's birthday party, it is easy to find the party, just look for the airport men's room with the balloons" --David Letterman