Taken - The Filthy Critic

Taken, as seen through the glassy eyes of The Filthy Critic

He infiltrates a snooty party where virgins are auctioned off to the highest bidders in a scene that I'm sure is meant to feel creepy but actually feels more like a laughable outtake from Eyes Wide Shut.

The moviemakers' glee in Taken is not in the plot, not in the acting, not in having anything at all to say. They don't give a seastar's tit about any of that. Their pride is showing how many people can die and how much action there is. That's really fucking sad since the action is often, vague, poorly lit to mask how old and frail Neeson is, and mostly not nearly as clever as Morel, Besson and Karmen think it is. It's pure fucking garbage: too lame to be mindless action, and too mindless to have anything to say. It's a fucking embarrassment. One Finger.