Late Night Political Jokes Updated

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"So, I don't know if this is a case of racism. The police in Cambridge say it had nothing to do with Gates being black. They said they would have given the same treatment to any minority." --Bill Maher

"There's a group of Americans who don't believe that Barack Obama was born in the United States and therefore should not be president. They're called 'birthers.' They are. The birthers want Obama's election to be invalidated, which, I'm not sure what their goal is. Are they aware that Joe Biden would be the president?" --Jimmy Kimmel

"The birthers believe that the president was secretly born in Kenya. ... I always thought he was born in a manger in Jerusalem." --Jimmy Kimmel

"But Kenya makes no sense. Listen, if Barack Obama had been born in Kenya, don't you think Madonna would have adopted him by now?" --Jimmy Kimmel

"Big news up in Alaska. Sarah Palin will formally step down as governor on Sunday, leaving us completely unprotected from the Russians." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Yesterday, Chicago White Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game. And afterwards, he had a five-minute phone conversation with President Obama, which was very cool. Meanwhile, the losing pitcher got a two-hour phone call from Joe Biden. " --Conan O'Brien

"This week, police in New Jersey busted a criminal ring that illegally sold everything from Gucci handbags to body parts. Which sounds like one-stop shopping for the Real Housewives of New Jersey." --Conan O'Brien

"This is crazy. Three mayors in New Jersey were arrested yesterday in a huge money laundering scheme. Investigators knew something didn't smell right, aside from what normally didn't smell right in New Jersey." --Jimmy Fallon

David Letterman's Top Ten Things Overheard at Sarah Palin's Farewell Party

• 5. Where can I check my pelt?