Other Crap

ROTTEN TOMATOES: Movies Opening This Week

This is a good week to read a book or go to the park.

• G-Force: 3200 theaters; no reviews yet. Disney 3-D animation directed by Jerry Bruckheimer. Nicolas Cage is a mole and Penelope Cruz plays a guinea pig. For Cage, it represents his most sensible hairstyle in a decade. I'm sad to see the great Sam Rockwell in something like this, but I guess Disney's checks don't bounce.
  
• The Orphan: 2600 theaters; 40% positive reviews. Evil orphan brings unspeakable horror to sensitive parents. I can't really describe it since unspeakable horror is also untypeable. It might be fun to watch if the mother is Madonna.
  
• The Ugly Truth: 2700 theaters; 10% positive reviews. Rom-com with Katherine Heigl. 'Nuff said.