Other Crap

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"Over at the White House, President Obama met with the Dalai Lama. One awkward moment when Rahm Emanuel stuck his head in the room and said, 'Who's the retard in the blanket?'" Bill Maher

"Dick Cheney loves snowboarding. He thinks it's waterboarding, but colder." David Letterman

The Tiger Woods press conference was earlier today, and I was riveted by that. I think the most interesting part was when he apologized to the 'mistress in your region.'" Craig Ferguson

David Letterman's Top Ten Signs You're Not Going To Win An Olympic Gold Medal

• 10. You're allergic to snow
  
• 9. Fired a gun during your event but it's not the biathlon
  
• 8. Your neck is too fat to hang a medal on
  
• 6. Nobody can find any record of your home nation "Funkytown"
  
• 4. You're having a hard time putting your pants on over your skis