Watch Beyoncé's Sexy New Fragrance Commercial That Was Banned in The U.K.

Watch Beyoncé's Sexy Fragrance Commercial (Banned in The U.K.)

I hope that you fans of celebrity fragrances get a chance to try mine, Uncle Scoopy's Rochester Nights. It includes some water from the Genessee River, taken downstream from Kodak of course, plus several different oils extracted from endangered species, all of which were cruelly slaughtered to stimulate their adrenal glands, thus enhancing the aroma.

A lot of manly men have written in to say that my scent sounds a little too wussified, but that's based on a misunderstanding. Rochester Nights is the women's perfume! The men's cologne is Uncle Scoopy's Jacque Straps. Don't be fooled by the sissy Frenchification of the name. My marketing guys told me we needed that in the perfume business. The cologne itself is redolent of the unwashed clothing in the locker room you remember so fondly from your youth.