The 2011 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction awards have been announced

The 2011 Bulwer-Lytton awards have been announced

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is an annual award for the worst opening sentence to an imaginary novel. It is named after the author of the 1830 novel that actually began with Snoopy's big line, "It was a dark and stormy night."

I like this one better than the winner:

"The victim was a short man, with a face full of contradictions: amalgam, composite, dental porcelain, with both precious and non-precious metals all competing for space in a mouth that was open, bloody, terrifying, gaping, exposing a clean set of asymptomatic impacted wisdom teeth, but clearly the object of some very comprehensive dental care, thought Dirk Graply, world-famous womanizer, tough guy, detective, and former dentist."