This Is The Last Story Ever Written About Cycling

This Is The Last Story Ever Written About Cycling

" International Cycling Union has erased his name from the record books and banned him from the sport for life, marking an ignoble epilogue to the athlete’s career and ensuring that cycling will never be mentioned in a mainstream news publication ever again, because, what’s the point?"

It's an Onion joke, but it's true enough. He was the only interesting thing about cycling, and he turned out to be guilty of skullduggery, thus removing the only reason why anyone would care about grown-ups in spandex riding their bikes.