Monday, December 09, 2013

Cheer Up, Harry Styles, You Just Had Sex With Kendall Jenner

Cheer Up, Harry Styles, You Just Had Sex With Kendall Jenner

"Sure there’s some natural remorse after nailing a Kardashian. That’s the cosmos confirming you’re going to die prematurely in some grisly manner. Still, if you’re Q score is high enough to bone eighteen-year-old Kendall Jenner on a gratis package in New York, you ought be wearing a shit-eating grin from ear to ear. You didn’t join a fucking boy band to make music, you sad mascara-wearing sack. You’ve notched Taylor Swift and now Kendall Jenner. You’re one Madonna’s busty daughter away from an epic deflowering trifecta. They’ll sing songs about you, I mean, real singers who can sing actual notes. It’ll blow your mind. Now quit looking askance like you’ve got VD and act like a fucking king."

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