Late Night Political Jokes - Late Night Jokes Updated Daily

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"You know who did not get a break last week? John McCain. Who took a lot of heat over his endorsement from two controversial preachers, Rod Parsley and John Hagee. Now, I'm not a big fan of Reverend Hagee. He lost me when he called the Catholic church the 'apostate church' and 'the great whore.' I've got no problem with the apostate part, because I don't know what that word means. But the great whore? You're talking about a religion that is against condoms and the pill. We would be terrible whores. Unless you're into pregnant whores, in which case, shame on you." --Jon Stewart

"Last week, the California Supreme Court handed down a ruling legalizing gay marriage. Now, many are shocked and outraged. I get the outrage. But shocked? That California is pro-gay? I assume these are the same people who were shocked when Elton John finally came out, even though he had been wearing fuchsia sun goggles with windshield wipers for years. The argument over gay marriage rages on. And I think I have a solution. If gay or lesbian couples want to get married, one of you just say you are a man, and the other just say you're a woman. You won't have to change your name, or the way you dress. We'll take your word for it. No one will ask you to drop trou and whip it out, okay? That's illegal. I know that for a fact" --Stephen Colbert