Other Crap

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"Well, according to MSNBC, President Obama's approval rating has now dipped below 50 percent. To tell you how bad it is, people are now finding ways to sneak out of the White House." Jay Leno

"The Obama Administration announced today that the Indians on Long Island will be federally recognized, which means they can now build a casino in New York City. The White House recognized them as an official tribe after meeting with the four tribal leaders, Fat Tony, Louie the Barber, Crazy Sal, and Momo Ricardo. The Gambino tribe, indigenous people to the area." Jay Leno

"According to a New York Times/CBS News poll, 26 percent of unemployed adults blame George W. Bush for the high unemployment rate. The other 74 percent blame the fact that they majored in English literature." Jimmy Fallon

"I don't know what to make out of this. NASA is in the process of trying to convert human waste into fuel. Man, talk about pressure to go on command, right? 'Come on, Barry, just pee. We got to get back to Earth, man.' 'I can't do it. Everyone is staring at me, man. Stop looking at me.'" Jimmy Fallon