Other Crap

"the apparent desire by some of Hollywood's hottest young female stars to be photographed getting in and out of limousines in short skirts while wearing absolutely no undergarments is arguably one of Tinseltown's most disturbing new crazes."

• Disturbing? I don't know. I'm not that disturbed by it. In fact, I don't mind at all. If I had absolute dictatorial power over the culture, like that guy in Turkmenistan, I'd outlaw female underwear, although I would allow my minions, henchmen, and lackeys to mandate underwear in certain exceptional cases. I'm lookin' at you, Rosie O'Donnell.