Other Crap

"SHANGHAI police have smashed a professional cricket fighting ring in a raid that snared the city's most notorious handler of the insects"

"Among those arrested today was 51-year-old man named Lin, who police described as a legend in the world of cricket fighting."

"Winning crickets can become famous and funerals have been known to be held for them when they are defeated. The prize fighters are fed special diets and are plied with female crickets to keep them in top form."

Back in the fifties, when cricket fighting was still legal in the Bronx, I went to a fight in the old Yankee Stadium, but I had to sit in the nosebleed seats. It was pretty difficult to tell which cricket was winning. On the other hand, I felt good about it. I only paid 50 cents for my seat. The people in the front row paid a thousand bucks, and they couldn't see the crickets either, so I figure I had the best seat in the house.

Well, except maybe for the ref, but I'm not sure he could see the crickets either, because he kept reaching for his magnifying glass. Kinda sad really. He wasn't used to working outdoor matches in the sunshine, and his glass accidentally fried up one of the thoroughbred crickets, the legendary Jiminy Three.

Fortunately, the crickets in Shanghai grow to the size of alpacas, so any seat is fine for visibility. In fact, it's best to sit back a bit, because those "cricket noises" can be really irritating in the front rows.