Late Night Political Jokes - Late Night Jokes Updated Daily

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"Well, you know, Defense Secretary Robert Gates said the Somali pirates were all 'untrained teenagers with heavy weapons,' or as we call them in this country, rap stars." --Jay Leno

"Scientists from the University of Padova, in Italy, announced this week that baby chicks have the ability to do basic arithmetic and can add basic numbers together. You know, it's bad enough our public school kids can't compete with kids in China and Japan. Now we're losing to Italian poultry." --Jay Leno

"I believe there hasn't been a dog in the White House since the pack of wolves that Cheney kept in his dungeon." --David Letterman

"A new report shows that a bag of heroin can be cheaper than a six-pack of beer. That's really good news and bad news for Amy Winehouse." --Jimmy Fallon

"Scott MacIntyre, a blind contestant, was recently voted off 'American Idol.' But he still has an inspirational story. He showed that in this country, even someone who can't see can grow up to finish eighth on 'American Idol,' and who knows, may even become governor of New York if the previous governor gets caught with a hooker." --Jimmy Kimmel