Slashed Ticket Prices Allow Lesser Nobility To Attend Yankees Games | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Slashed Ticket Prices Allow Lesser Nobility To Attend Yankees Games

"Though the Duchess and I would often speak of seeing a Yankees game one day, somehow our ticket money was always being spent to build a cathedral or launch a fleet of ships. When we were given this opportunity, we thought, 'Well, what's one less cask of jewels in the treasury?'"

"Though they are one of the most legendary teams in sports, the Yankees have often struggled with the perception among the landed gentry that they are unfriendly to those who fall beneath the rank of Prince-Consort, are further back than 15th in line to the throne, or cannot trace their lineage back to Queen Boudicca"