Late Night Political Jokes - Late Night Jokes Updated Daily

Late Night Political Jokes Updated

"BP is running with this, I guess. Their company newsletter has an article that says most gulf residents aren't upset with BP because their cleanup crews have boosted the local economy. BP taking credit for boosting the economy in the gulf is like al Qaeda taking credit for creating jobs in airport security." –Jimmy Kimmel

"The Russian spies tried to blend in. They were acting like Americans. As a matter of fact, for two weeks, they were pretending they loved soccer." –David Letterman

"You remember Vice President Dick Cheney? He's had like six or seven heart attacks. The poor guy was in the hospital over the weekend. He has been in the hospital so many times the gift shop is now selling Dick Cheney bobble head dolls." –David Letterman

"Now, there's a tropical storm in that area and it may interfere with the clean-up of the Gulf. Too bad, because it was going pretty well." –David Letterman

"And now, in the Gulf region, demonstrators are holding hands on the beach by way of protest. Boy, that'll show 'em." –David Letterman

"Forbes magazine published their most powerful celebrities list. Number one was Oprah Winfrey. I'm happy to be on the list, a little farther down. I'm between Flo, the Progressive Insurance lady, and the Salahis." –David Letterman