James Franco's Comedy Central roast: The 26 best lines

James Franco's Comedy Central roast: The 26 best lines

Rogen: “Look at me doing all the talking while you sit there doing nothing. I feel like I’m cohosting the Oscars with you.”

Rogen on Sarah Silverman: “We worked together on Take This Waltz, She did full frontal nudity in the movie. I always thought she was very liberal, but it turns out she is a giant Bush supporter.”

Jonah Hill: “Bill Hader was brilliant on SNL and when he left the show every single person was like, ‘What are you doing? You’re never ever going to work again.’ And what does my man Bill do? Boom, he books a T-Mobile commercial. Who’s laughing now, Lorne Michaels? My man Bill is. If that thing goes national, we could be talking like 10, 15 grand. This guy’s cashing checks from the fourth largest mobile provider in the nation. I respect Bill because Sprint was coming after him hard, but he held out for that f–k you T Mobile money.”

Hill: “He recently got his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, which is incredible because now critics and homeless people can s–t on him all the time.”

Natasha Leggero: “Andy Samberg’s comedy group is called The Lonely Island, which is how each of his teeth feel.”

Ansari: “So many gay jokes tonightabout Franco. Apparently if you’re clean, well dressed and mildly cultured, you’re super gay now. Is that why the rest of you guys are so aggressively fat and dirty? You think if you read one book and take a shower, dicks are going to just fly into your face.”

Franco: “I agreed to do this roast because I wanted to do something I’ve never done before — something that has zero artistic value, something nobody will remember three months from now, something that’s offensive, homophobic and stars horrifically untalented people and something that’s only a big deal to a handful of teenage stoners on Twitter. You might say, ‘James, didn’t you just describe Your Highness? I wouldn’t know. I didn’t see Your Highness.”